The always funny Euro-English joke

The European Union commissioners have announced that an agreement has been reached to adopt English as the preferred language for European communications, rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five-year phased plan for what will be known as EuroEnglish (Euro for short).

In the first year, "s" will be used instead of the soft "c". Sertainly, sivil servants will resieve this news with joy. Also, the hard "c" will be replaced with "k". Not only will this klear up konfusion, but typewriters kan have one less letter.

There will be growing publik emthusiasm in the sekond year, when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced by "f". This will make words like "fotograf" 20 per sent shorter.

In the third year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.

Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horible mes of silent "e"s in the languag is disgrasful, and they would go.

By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" by z" and "w" by v

During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou", and similar changes vud of kors be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.

After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubls or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech ozer.

Ze drem vil finali kum tru!

The X-Files: I Want to Believe

Immediately after leaving the theater I said to my friends that this film would have been better served with a September or October release.

The movie just didn't scream "summer blockbuster", not even like the first film did.

People expected monsters, they expected aliens. They expected evil men in black suits running around conspiring.

Personally the film wasn't bad, but it just wasn't a film that should have been released in the Summer.

Oh well.

***/*****

Lost Metropolis footage found!

Hooray! They've done the near-impossible. People have found footage thought lost forever from a film that was released originally in 1927.

Full article here: Yahoo: Argentines find lost 'Metropolis' scenes

Metropolis is stunning. For those who don't know about this film, the film takes place in the year 2026, where the human race is divided between the thinkers and workers. The thinkers don’t know how to do anything but plan, and the workers know how to execute the plans but don’t have vision to create plans.

The workers secretly listen to Maria, who wants to find a mediator to link the two halves. The son of the thinker’s leader, Joh Fredersen, travels into the underground to see what his fellow men do. The shock and awe that Joh goes through seeing his fellow men suffer for hours and hours each day to keep his world running smoothly.

Joh’s father decides that Maria must be stopped. To keep everyone in place he contacts Rotwang, the inventor, and they both plan to stop her. Unfortunately Rotwang has other plans for Maria, and his newly created robot.

The film was decades before its time. I'm just glad we'll be able to see it in its (near) entirety soon.

Super Mario Brothers - Frustration

Hype, thy name is Avatar

I've yet to see a film so hyped on the internet in many years, if ever to this magnitude. There are people throwing around "revolutionary", "groundbreaking" and even "Oscar." Some have claimed it will be better than the Godfather.

At least people should have an actual baseline of whether or not the graphics are actually as "ground-breaking" as they claim they will be. All this talk about how this film will be the greatest 18 months out and over a year before we'll actually see anything from the film is ridiculous. Has everyone forgotten the hype surrounding "Final Fantasy: The Spirits Within" and how well that translated into a good or successful film?

Sure, I realize that Final Fantasy's hype is fan boy fueled, but most of the things I've read from people don't pass the smell test. It smells fishy. Either the studios are paying for cheap hype, Cameron has way too much time on his hands (and posting under sock-puppets), or there really are people out there that will convince themselves a year and a half before a film is released that that film will be the best thing since refrigerated air and the ultimate cinematic work of art ever created.

Talk is cheap. People shouldn't be making any judgments (positive or negative) about this film's "groundbreaking" nature until an actual trailer is released. This kind of hype generally backfires, causing the people who have only a passing fancy to the cinema to scoff and avoid such work if it doesn't mass their stringent standards to film.