Waiting Patiently

12 Days of Christmas: The Advent Reunion

A different kind of Christmas story.

Andrew Klavan's Christmas Ghost The Advent Reunion, Part 1

Andrew Klavan's Christmas Ghost The Advent Reunion, Part 2

Andrew Klavan's Christmas Ghost The Advent Reunion, Part 3

Andrew Klavan's Christmas Ghost The Advent Reunion, Part 4


Andrew Klavan's Christmas Ghost The Advent Reunion, Part 5

12 Days of Christmas: This and That

Start watching the Black Adder Christmas Carol.

Start watching the The Office UK Christmas Special.

I've been busy, and haven't really had a lot of time to watch much the last few days. The winter storm really set everything back a few days so I've been running around like a Christmas goose with its head cut off. What can I say?

12 Days of Christmas: How the Grinch Stole Christmas!

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch.
You really are a heel.
You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel.
Mr. Grinch.

You're a bad banana
With a greasy black peel.

You're a monster, Mr. Grinch.
Your heart's an empty hole.
Your brain is full of spiders,
You've got garlic in your soul.
Mr. Grinch.

I wouldn't touch you, with a
thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole.

You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch.
You have termites in your smile.
You have all the tender sweetness
Of a seasick crocodile.
Mr. Grinch.

Given the choice between the two of you
I'd take the seasick crockodile.

You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch.
You're a nasty, wasty skunk.
Your heart is full of unwashed socks
Your soul is full of gunk.
Mr. Grinch.

The three words that best describe you,
are, and I quote: "Stink. Stank. Stunk."

You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch.
You're the king of sinful sots.
Your heart's a dead tomato splot
With moldy purple spots,
Mr. Grinch.

Your soul is an apalling dump heap overflowing
with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable
rubbish imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots.

You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch.
With a nauseaus super-naus.
You're a crooked jerky jockey
And you drive a crooked horse.
Mr. Grinch.

You're a three decker saurkraut and toadstool
sandwich
With arsenic sauce.

I claim no rights to the lyrics presented in this blog entry. Please visit the Dr. Seuss website.
Copyright © 1957, Dr. Seuss.
The BluRay looks wonderful, buy it.

12 Days of Christmas: Christmas Vacation

Granted the only real good Vacation film was the original National Lampoon's Vacation film, but Christmas Vacation has always found a warm spot in my heart. Better than "European Vacation", and certainly better than the subsequent Vacation films such as "Vegas Vacation," Christmas Vacation just hits the right spots.

Being a Vacation film, the plot is pretty straightforward. Clark Griswold (Chevy Chase) gets the Griswold family together at his house for the Christmas celebration. Crazy antics follow as expected. The kids look different, yet again. The film then revolves around slapstick moments and prat falls. This film never takes itself too seriously.

It's a good film to catch at Christmas time amongst so many of the same style films, where the main characters either go visit their crazy relatives or receive a visit from said family members. I'm just shocked that the film came out 20 years ago.

12 Days of Christmas: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe

Well, I remember my first reactions of this film. While my enthusiasm has diminished quite a deal since the film was first released, I still find myself quite happy with the end results.

I still feel that this film was one of the few gems of 2005. Not to pass over the many fine films that came out this year, but this is one of the few films that I had really been looking forward to that year. I was skeptical at first, wondering if they could actually do the book justice, much like I was skeptical about how well they could do Lord of the Rings justice.

Then I saw the first trailer. I was sold right then and there. It looked the production crew honestly know the source material and what they were doing. I was completely amazed at the entire thing.

The story begins with the opens up with the Pevensie children (Lucy, Edmund, Peter, and Susan) going to the home of Professor Kirke, who lives in the country. It's World War II and the Germans are bombing London, so it's safer to get those children out of the city. One day they are playing hide-and-seek, Lucy comes across a wardrobe and enters. She's entered an entirely new world! No one believes her until they enter as well.

They meet some of the creatures that reside in the magical land, notably the Beaver family. By the way, they look amazingly done in the film. The White Witch is the ruler of this land, a land where it's always Winter and never Christmas. How horrible is that thought? Well they are perused, as the Sons and Adam and the Daughters of Eve (humans) are not welcome in this land.

Aslan, a mysterious Lion (voiced by Liam Neeson) is returning to the land, and the spell that the Witch has placed over the land is beginning to break. Time to rally the troops. Now, in the book they don't dwell too much on the actual battle, but in our age, it would be a major disapointment to not expand and show whats going on, so it looks like we're gonna be given a fantastic battle. A lot of other stuff goes on, but I'm not gonna discuss that in here because, well you need to go see the film.

This is the first story of seven in the Chronicles of Narnia, and as it's looking at the moment, probably the first of three films that will make it to the big screen.

I was in college when the film came out, and had to drag along one of my good friends to the film. Well, he wasn't a real big fan of the movie, but I loved it. Prince Caspian was strong in may respects, but doesn't have the same *feel* that I got when watching this film. Fox Studios picked up Voyage of the Dawn Treader, which will be out December 10th.

**** out of *****

12 Days of Christmas: Critter Christmas

Woodland Critter Christmas is a disturbing episode of South Park in which a story is recited about Stan and his adventures with the seemingly innocent Woodland Critters in the days leading up to Christmas.

The critters are kind, polite, and speak in innocent and cutesy language around Stan, befriending him, though it is through force by the narrator. Stan, again through force by the narrator, builds the Critters a manger. Unfortunately for Stan, he realizes far too late that the Critters have something a bit more sinister.

Not for the easily disturbed.

Bryan Singer returns to X-Men franchise

Bryan Singer will develop and direct "X-Men: First Class" for 20th Century Fox based on an article I read at IMDb. I'm not sure how to feel about this after seeing his Superman film, however he did make two solid X-Men films and none of the Superman films have been "great."

Before you freak out, the first Superman film has wonderful Smallville scenes at the beginning than collapses into parody, the second film has some moments but just isn't that good, and the less that's said about the next two, the better. Singer's Superman film wasn't an awful Superman film, but it wasn't a good film. However, I'd consider X2 a good film, and not just a good X-Men film, so there is promise.

12 Days of Christmas: Red Green Christmas

The Red Green Show and my family go way back. The Canadian comedy show which aired on PBS here in the States from 1991 to 2006 (apparently the longest running live-action scripted comedy in the world), was something I regularly watched.

Sure some of the comedy doesn't make sense from a cultural standpoint - it is designed for a Canadian audience, but most of it translates well across our Northern border.

Every few years I pop in one of the two Red Green Christmas specials. They're funny. The show is silly.

Probably the one downside is that you really need to *know* some of the minor characters a bit better than being introduced to them the first time when watching this, but not necessary. Folks watching will understand the quirky "Possum Lodge" members, their criminal tendencies, their frugality which borders on psychosis, and their Canadian insanity.

The handy tips on how to create your very own sleigh out of a old car and a van that blasts Christmas music while driving down the street end in glorious disaster.

After watching these again, they're permanently on the Christmas viewing lineup.

"Remember, we're all in this together..."

Has The Asylum done it right for once?

On my birthday this past weekend, my buddy Jonathan and I were perusing The Asylum, the wonderful company who has made wonderful movies which were knock-offs of films such as:

100,000,000 BC ... 10,000 BC
Alien Vs Hunter ... Alien Vs Predator
I Am Omega ... (A mix of "Omega Man" and "I am Legend")
Snakes on a Train ... Snakes on a Plane
Transmorphers ... Transformers
The Da Vinci Treasure ... The DaVinci Code

Well we came across the trailer for the upcoming Princess of Mars, based on the Edgar Rice Burroughs science fiction novel.

Well, while I don't know how good or bad the script is based on this teaser, nor do I know how well acted it is, I do have to say that the effects do appear to be of much higher quality than I'm normally used to (the ones in the War of the Worlds films they made were "terrible"). It also has filters applied to it and something other than the "set the camera down and shoot" style that many of these films have.

I'm not that familiar with the work itself, but I'm not sure that Antonio Sabato Jr. can really pass himself off as Virginian Confederate soldier, John Carter. Though judging on one of the screen shots I saw, I'm guessing he's just going to be a modern day US Soldier.

The film will be released December 29, 2009. We'll then be able to see if they've infused a little passion into this production.

12 Days of Christmas: A Charlie Brown Christmas

A Charlie Brown Christmas is the popular 1965 Peanuts special following Charles Schultz's creations.

I haven't seen this for years. That said, upon re-watching the Vince Guaraldi music is probably the best part of this entire special, followed by Snoopy's antics.

Charlie Brown's portrayal is so depressing that I'm not sure I'd ever want to show this to my kids. What's worse is Charlie is complaining about the commercialization of Christmas and then within 30 seconds we're barraged with commercials for, guess what? Christmas sales!

The special doesn't really get good until it's over half over until Linus tells everyone "what Christmas is all about." Well, I bet I could find a youtube clip of just that part.

NBC Thursday Night

While certainly not the bastion of comedy as it was in the 90s, I enjoy at least 3 of the 4 shows that air on NBC Thursday nights, which is the most I can safely say I've been able to enjoy in almost a decade.

The Office Christmas episode, was "Secret Santa," this season's Christmas episode. Michael's jealous about Phyllis taking the part. The episode starts off pretty meandering, slow, and a little bad. The episode quickly picks up speed and is a lot better by the end, even if I'm not totally convinced that the arc is the smart route to go down.

The Parks and Recreation Christmas episode, was "Christmas Scandal." Leslie is accused of having an affair with a council member by runaway local media outlets.

Here's a few other Christmas Clips:

12 Days of Christmas: The Avengers

Too Many Christmas Trees is an episode of the Avengers, the classic 1960s british detective and spy show staring Diana Rigg as Emma Peel and Patick Macnee as John Steed.

Too Many Christmas Trees doesn't contain a lot of "Christmas" in the story, but is set in December, with Steed and Mrs. Peel traveling to a Christmas party. The story mainly consists of a group of people who are trying to psychically control John Steed's actions. The story heavily involves Dickens, with notable instances of "A Christmas Carol" being introduced into the story during the Christmas party.

The episode deviates slightly from the normal formula that the show normally revolves around, where the team is brought in to solve a case or mystery. The story involves an organization going after Steed himself. The episode prior to this "Two's a Crowd" also follows this same formula.

12 Days of Christmas: Merry Christmas Mr. Bean

"Merry Christmas Mr. Bean" is one of those quintessential Christmas staples around my family's household during the Christmas season, as essential to our Christmas celebration as decorating the Christmas tree or eating candy canes. This hilarious episode is brought out once a year to enjoy and laugh at Mr. Bean's insane antics.

Like all Mr. Bean episodes this one is segmented into different parts, however unlike most episodes, these have much more in common with each other - it's Christmas Eve. At the start of the episode Bean arrives at Harrods, the mega-huge London store, to do some shopping. He buys a "special" gift for his girlfriend, "finds" a Christmas tree, and stuffs a turkey. This is by far the Bean episode filled with the most laughs and will have you laughing till you cry.

Throughout the years I've come across people who love Mr. Bean, hate Mr. Bean, and some who just don't get Mr. Bean and are confused or terrified of him. Bean's social awkwardness and complete disconnect to the real world are both humourous and sad at the same moment. This is a lonely man, who has no real friends, and has a girlfriend always on the verge of leaving him. Yet he's incredibly content with his life. He is annoyed quite easily by some of the most littlest of things, and quite frequently too (much to our delight), but he is still happy in a life that most would probably be constantly depressed about.

Rowan Atkinson has played many different characters over the years (in the various Black Adder series and Thin Blue Line) but none are as iconic as Bean, even if I find his Edmund Blackadder much more hilarious with his use of wit and sarcasm.

The Room is an awful film that must be watched

I was finally able to see this monstrosity of a film, and it did not disappoint.

I have a feeling people like my brother that do this and want to do this type of thing for a living would cry just at how poorly framed, plotted, and edited every single scene was in this so-called movie.

Lost: Season One Revisited

Spurred on by my Brother's quest to watch all the episodes of Lost before the Season 6 premiere in February, I've joined in as well. This started on December 6th. I finished Season one on December 11, only delayed slightly by the fact I have a good paying job that I have to go to and that I had to catch up on the first nine episodes of "Better Off Ted" on Hulu (before the episodes expired). This Grand Lost Viewing has pushed back my upcoming Christmas viewing slightly, but only by a few days. However, 5 days is nothing. I was able to watch this season in roughly 19 hours straight, with a short break for pizza for dinner with some of my good college friends, Matt, Ellis, and Stephanie (though she chickened out and didn't stick around for the entire thing).

Well Season One of Lost kicks off with a cast comprising of Matthew Fox, Josh Holloway, Evangeline Lilly, Terry O'Quinn, Dominic Monaghan, Emilie de Ravin, Naveen Andrews, Emilie de Ravin, Jorge Garcia, Maggie Grace, Yunjin Kim, Daniel Dae Kim, Harold Perrineau, Malcolm David Kelley, and Ian Somerhalder.

So Season one is over, and it didn't fail to impress, just as always. Lost's first season is at the moment the strongest season they made. Full of emotional highs and lows, even in the weakest episodes there are worthwhile moments. Essentially it was almost completely flawless, which as I've said before is something that very few series are capable of and every show yearns for.

The episodes I found to be strongest this season were Walkabout, with one of the most heart wrenching moments I've seen on a television show; The explosive Pilot, with the greatest opening to a television series ever; and the season finale, Exodus. The episodes I found to be weakest this season were Charlie's flashback-centric episodes and "All the Best Cowboys Have Daddy Issues" which I just couldn't quite connect with.

Something that my brother noticed that I have to agree with was that the flashbacks are handled quite differently in this season than later seasons. The first batch of episodes were primarily filled with flashbacks that focused on brief glimpses of the character's pasts. Most of the back stories presented were well integrated into their respective stories, allowing for a good idea of where the character was, and where they were now. The few that didn't do this well were Charlie centric-flashback episodes.

The cliffhanger ending of season one caused one of the most painful and long waits I had to endure in my entire television-watching life.

MST3K now available on Hulu

Yes! Took long enough.

Five episodes have appeared on Hulu!

Christmas is coming

Be good.

More later.

How did I miss theses?

This will hopefully become a regular post of various musings and interesting tidbits I've come across over the last week (two weeks, month?). So he's the ones I've come across just over the last few days:

Mad Max

I knew a fourth installment of the Mad Max series was green-lit (probably called Mad Max: Fury Road). What I didn't realize was that UK actor, Tom Hardy is the lead. Hardy was the main villain of the tenth Star Trek film, Nemesis. The poorly edited film butchered not only the main cast's performances, but his as well and it appeared to almost destroy what many believed was a rising star.

1. Let's hope this Mad Max film is good.
2. Let's hope that time has been good to Hardy and that if he still has that promise, that he can capitalize on it.

Heck, based on the last few sequels, I don't expect much, but hey - it's gotta be better than "Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome"

Green Lantern

In February I mentioned that they got director Martin Campbell (GoldenEye, Casino Royale) attached. Then, back in July they cast Ryan Reynolds as the most well known and probably the most popular Green Lantern, Hal Jordan. Now I've read that the upcoming Green Lantern film will not be an "origin" story. Thank God. I'm sick of these things - where the film never picks up until the final act because the first 3/4ths of it were spent introducing everyone to the "universe." This may backfire, but I'm hoping that it works and could set a sta

When it works, it works - the newest Hulk film was a vast improvement over the 2003 version - which presented the "origin" as an arty montage in during the opening credits instead of spending the entire film setting up the pieces for a sequel that never happened. I personally find that Spider-Man was essentially all build up, with Spider-Man 2 re-hashing the exact same plot points (walking into Spider-Man 2 without any knowledge of the events in the first film is extremely easy). Batman Begins and Iron Man are exceptions, but with the rumors of a "origin" story Superman film in the works, I was worried we couldn't just be introduced mid-stream to someone (a la Batman '89).

Parker Brothers is insane

The toy company, Parker Brothers, and whoever those production companies that bought the rights to their boardgames are morons. Clue at least had established characters that could conceivably be expanded into a whodunit mystery film. Battleship? Monopoly?

What, does the film primarily follow Mr. Moneybags as he gets $15 bank errors in his favor and is consistently thrown in jail only to be released because of lucky dice throws? I'd hate to even look to see if a "Risk" movie is being made...